Permission Denied

Today I deny myself permission. I deny myself permission to feel less, to overthink, to let my thoughts be ruled by damage done by other people. I deny myself permission to doubt or to go against my values. I deny myself permission to drown in grief or mourn in unhealthy ways. I deny myself permission … Continue reading Permission Denied →

To Hill and Back

This is the story of how I am winning my weight loss battle. And the truth is, a big part of it comes down to moving to Spain. What matters most about that is that it has happened in spite of everything else going on in my life. I moved to Spain for a lot … Continue reading To Hill and Back →

Still here.

Today was one of those days, and it has carried over into the night. I’m exhausted, physically and mentally. My limbs feel like they’re filled with wet sand, my brain like it’s running on wine and stress. But before I let the day end, I’m here to say it: I’m still here. Late last year, … Continue reading Still here. →

Today, I Need to Write About My Mom.

I miss my mom. My mom was extraordinary. That’s not just daughter-talk; it’s fact. If you’d only met her at the very end, you might not have known it — but her life could have been a novel. She survived more than most people do in three lifetimes. Abuse, neglect, violence — and still, when … Continue reading Today, I Need to Write About My Mom. →

Steps, Big and Small

I have this goal to post every single day, but tonight when I sat down I wasn’t sure what I was going to write about — because it’s actually been a good day. And lately, I’ve caught myself wondering where my good days have gone. Still, I’ve been showing up for my goals, even when … Continue reading Steps, Big and Small →

Moving Towards …

I thought I was chasing a new place, a new experience — but I was really searching for a version of myself I hadn’t met yet. This is a story about movement, identity, and starting over at 53, even after everything breaks.